My husband is a big guy. Not in the "fat" way, but in the "guy-who-clearly-lifts-weights" way. He's taking a very simple approach to our "Cheat to Lose" diet.
Case in point, he takes a bottle of fish oil to work every day and that is how he meets his fat intake requirement. He leaves this bottle out on his desk, in clear view of any passers-by. Yesterday, he told me that he'd been getting some comments on it from coworkers such as "we never know what kind of strange food you're going to bring in."
For whatever reason, here's where my crazy brain went:"He can leave his diet food right out in the open and people will just assume he eats a certain way because he's a weight lifter. I have to hide my food because when people see a fat girl eating cottage cheese, they assume it's because she's unhappy with herself and wants to be thin."
Yeah, I'm insane, but hear me out: It's very important to me that no one knows I hate my body. My self-loathing is like my dirty little secret. I need people to think that I think I look fabulous. If I can convince them that I like myself, they'll be less judgmental of me. Probably not, but that's my motivation.
I also hate when people see me eat. It's so messed up, but fat girls shouldn't eat, right?
Yeah. This is why I'm in counseling.
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