Sterilization is stressful

I had my essure consultation today. I was pleasantly surprised that the Dr. didn't try to talk me out of it. He did stress that it was a permanent form of birth control several times. The more he said it, the more excited I became as the thought of permanent birth control is THRILLING to me.

I'm very upset to learn that there's a 10% chance that, once I'm sedated, the Dr. will be unable to locate my tubes. If he can't locate my tubes, he can't insert the essure implant into them. So there is a chance that I will go to the hospital, be knocked out (by meds and all my co-pays), only to walk out of the hospital a fertile Myrtle.

That makes me sad. I guess it's a chance we'll have to take. Whatever the expense, it's still less expensive than having a kid.

I dreamt last night that I was pregnant. I was SO UPSET. I thought my life was over. I was mourning all the things we'd never be able to do now that I was pregnant. In the dream, I ran into a friend of mine who was unable to successfully carry her 2nd pregnancy to term. She was really upset that I was pregnant and miserable while she was so desperate to be pregnant. I OFFERED HER MY BABY!

Funny that I don't even want kids on a subconscious level.

I really hope the essure procedure is successful.

Shopping for maternity clothes

Now don't get all excited. I'm not knocked up. Just fat.

I had to cave in and purchase some non-work clothes. I went to Target and the only plus size clothes that were fashionable were by Liz Lang. For those of you who don't shop at Target, Liz Lang specializes in maternity fashions.

So while I'm not pregnant, I am, in fact, wearing maternity clothes.

I don't know if I should laugh or cry...

Essure? Yes I am.

It's no secret that I don't want to have children. Fortunately, neither does my husband. I've always known this. My entire life I knew I'd eventually be married, but I never wanted to have kids. Ever.

Having recently turned 30, I think it's high time I take my fertility seriously. Sure, I'm cautious. My husband and I rely on 3 layers of protection. I'm sure we're 99.9999999997% protected against parenthood. It's that 0.0000000003% chance that terrifies me.

Recently our friends welcomed their first child. We payed them a visit days after its' arrival. As I walked in and saw my friend sitting there, swollen to high heaven with a baby on her lap, I thought, "if that was me, I'd kill myself".

This visit has inspired me to look into sterilization. Sounds high-drama, I know, but I'm that serious about my family planning.

I have an appointment next week with a doctor who performs the essure procedure. If you're unfamiliar with the procedure, it's pretty amazing. I'm not going to describe it because it makes me want to cross my legs and vomit, but I think I can handle 35 minutes of extreme discomfort.

I'm sure it's not as painful as motherhood.

Discrimination

This article sickens me.

I love that employers are all about helping "people" maintain a "life/work balance" as long as those "people" are parents.

As a childfree woman who works in a cubicle, I would be horribly offended if Suzie, who decides to have a child, gets use of an office for 9 months!

Another favorite:

"Scout is so well-adjusted, and people come over all the time to play with her. They jump at the chance to watch Scout if I have a phone call," Hewlett says.

So when you have a phone call and can't take care of your child, other employees who DO want to take care of your child get to take time out of their work day to do so? Since I don't want to babysit for you I guess I'll just sit over here and WORK!

I'm also horrified by:

Many companies balk at the concept of babies at work full time. At Ernst & Young accounting firm, parents can get subsidized, backup child care in their homes.

Why would an office subsidize childcare? I certainly hope there's a comparable subsidy being offered to the employees who chose NOT to have children, but I sincerely doubt it.

Don't even get me started on maternity leave, the increased use of sick days by employees with children, the assumption that I don't really need any premium vacation days (ie: Christmas, etc) since I don't have children, the fact that I could never leave work early to hit the gym but a parent can leave for any myriad of child-related reasons (play, recital, soccer game, whatever)...

Ugh. I guess I am started.